SPIRITUALITY FOR EVERYDAY RELATIONSHIPS

Ephesians 5:21—6:9

Preached at Belmont Baptist Church on September 5, 2010

I once heard Rev. Charlie Shedd talk with teenagers about dating and sexuality. He started out by asking: what is your theology of God? My first reaction was—he’ll loose them. Young people who are trying to find their way through the obstacle course of sexual relationships aren’t interested in talking about God. But Charlie’s question was on target. It didn’t take me long to realize that how a young person relates to God affects how they see themselves and how they deal with the maze of issues around sexuality.

Well, I have a question for you: what do you believe about the church? In our scripture this morning, God teaches us about the relationships we have with our spouses, with our families, and those with whom we work on a regular basis. Basically the writer is saying this: what you believe about Jesus and the church will determine how you relate to people who are close to you on an everyday basis. So what do you believe about the church?

In verse 25 of our scripture passage, we see that Jesus loved the church and gave His life for it. When Jesus demonstrated his love, it was risky. There was no guarantee that you, I, or anyone would accept that love. When we do accept and respond, we realize that Jesus gave himself for our well-being. And the more I learn about His selfless giving, the more I am amazed. “Jesus really does love me!” It is this same amazement and reverence that is to be part of marriage. In freely extending and demonstrating love to another, we take a great risk. We hope that the other will accept that love and respond, but there is no guarantee. When there is that acceptance and response, both wife and husband are amazed at the power of love which draws them together and makes them one.

What you believe about the church also affects the relationships between parents and children. The writer points to the commandment about honoring your father and mother. He identifies it as the first commandment with a promise. If we don’t get this one, we will probably have difficulty with most of the rest of them. So how does this relate to what you believe about church? The writer knows that the commandments were part of God’s covenant with his people. In the Old Testament, God committed himself to the Israelites. The Commandments were a sign of this commitment by God. By accepting the commandments, the people of Israel accepted this relationship with God. The Israelites chose to be God’s people and accepted God’s love.

In the same way, parents are to choose to love their children—just like God choose to love Israel. To love them means to seek their welfare. When children accept and respond to that love, they will find that they have a life of “shalom”—of peace and wholeness and well-being. That doesn’t mean that our children and grandchildren won’t have ups and downs. What it means is that they will have at the core of their being a sense that they are OK. They will know that they are loved because they know that they are loved by their parents and families. It is our responsibility to love in a way that is as dependable as God’s love. Don’t provoke, don’t exasperate, but love. Our children and grandchildren will experience the blessing promised in scripture for the rest of their lives.

There is one more part of our everyday relationships: it is the area of work relationships outside the family. In the ancient world, relationships around work were usually unhealthy—whether a person was a slave owner or a slave. Some slaves would faun over their master in the hope of receiving more favorable treatment—not unlike what some people do with their bosses today. In other instances, slaves worked deceitfully against their owners—not unlike what some people do in their workplaces today. On the other side, owners often showed favoritism or were inconsiderate. Often slaves were treated as property that could be disposed of. We could find parallels today.

In this passage, God is telling us that we need to look at these everyday relationships in a new light—the light of Jesus Christ and his church. Do we believe that Jesus death on the cross demonstrated the worth of every human being in God’s sight? If so, we will see worth in every human. Do we believe that Jesus’ love is extended without judgment or condemnation? Then we will refrain from unjust criticism or critical spirit in our dealings with others and not be partial to some and disregard others. Do we believe that our work is a form of worship, offered to God for his praise…and that we will someday have to give an account of all our works to God? Then we will do our work as unto the Lord. Do we believe that grace guides our relationships with God? Then we will extend grace to those we deal with everyday. And that is the key—GRACE. We have been extended grace so that we can extend grace to others.

So what do you believe about the church? You are Christ’s body, the church—whether you are here in this space, or at home, or wherever. You are Christ’s body, the church, in your dealings with family and friends…with coworkers and bosses…with everyone. Do you believe that the church exists because of Christ’s love? Then extend love to your spouse. Do you believe that we are to encourage and support one other in the church? Then encourage and support your children and grandchildren. Do you believe that church is where we experience grace and learn to live by grace? Then extend grace to others wherever you go. You see, what you believe about the church shows in our every day relationships and not just when you gather together on Sunday morning.